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about log in rating date ^^^ 1205 10-jan 9:49:29 ^^^ 1178 i told my sister she was drawing her eyebrows too high. she look surprised. 21-nov 10:23:23 ^^^ 1066 what do you get if you cross a kangaroo with a sheep? a woolly jumper 17-feb 7:19:34 ^^^ 1065 whoever invented knock knock jokes should get a no-bell prize 21-sep 14:23:02 ^^^ 1062 q: why did the banana go to the doctors? a: he wasn't peeling very well 16-may 5:57:47 ^^^ 1054 normal people believe that if it ain't broke, don't fix it. engineers believe that if it ain't broke, it doesn't have enough features yet. 6-feb 9:51:25 ^^^ 1001 what's brown and sticky? a stick 17-may 5:39:18 ^^^ 992 what has 8 legs and 8 eyes? 8 pirates! 9-feb 5:54:23 ^^^ 965 what did the spanish fire chief call his twin sons? josea and joseb! 13-sep 7:56:11 ^^^ 965 dyslexic man walks into a bra 26-sep 19:43:37 ^^^ 956 q: what do you call a fish with no eye? a: fsh 9-jan 18:05:04 ^^^ 941 q: how many spaniards does it take to change a lightbulb? a: juan! 19-may 9:21:52 ^^^ 935 what did the drummer get on his iq test? drool. 15-jun 7:31:48 ^^^ 924 what do you call someone who hangs around with musicians? a drummer 15-jun 7:29:56 ^^^ 916 "you know, i'm not very good at magic - i can only do half of a trick. yes - i'm a member of the magic semi-circle" 27-jun 8:25:05 ^^^ 907 my friend is addicted to drinking brake fluid, but he can stop at any time. 9-jan 18:08:04 ^^^ 899 i visited the offices of the rspca today. it's tiny, you couldn't swing a cat in there. 27-jun 8:24:25 ^^^ 850 what do you call a boomerang that doesn't come back? a stick 13-may 5:47:51 ^^^ 847 did you hear about the dyslexic, agnostic insomniac? he stayed up all night wondering if there really was a dog! 19-may 5:47:36 ^^^ 846 why are there no painkillers in the jungle??? because the parrots-eat-em-all (paracetamol)!! 21-sep 13:37:24 ^^^ 843 what cheese is made backwards? edam! 11-sep 6:13:46 ^^^ 838 i got clipped on my bike by a truck carrying omega 3 pills yesterday. i'm okay though - just super-fish-oil injuries 26-mar 11:02:19 ^^^ 829 what do you call a deer with no eyes? no idea (no eye-deer)! 19-may 5:44:14 ^^^ 812 how do you tell when a plane load of pommies have landed at sydney airport? when the captain shuts down the engines there is still a whining sound! 22-may 19:26:37 ^^^ 811 q: what do you get if you cross a cocker spaniel with a poodle and a rooster? a: cock-a-poodle-doo! 15-jan 21:59:56 ^^^ 809 i went on a date with a girl with a stutter. the waiter asked what she would like to order. she said, " n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n" at that point, i decided to help her out and shouted "batman!" 9-sep 14:41:41 ^^^ 806 16-jan 21:29:47 ^^^ 802 22-may 19:29:30 ^^^ 802 one snowman says to the other snowman, "you're right - i can smell carrots too!" 16-may 10:48:10 ^^^ 800 two aerials meet on a roof, fall in love get married. the ceremony wasn't much but the reception was brilliant. 16-jan 21:17:57 ^^^ 791 how many south americans does it take to change a lightbulb a brazilian ! 16-may 9:49:31 ^^^ 789 q: what is copper nitrate? a: overtime pay for police officers 13-jan 21:03:33 ^^^ 788 i went to the zoo the other day, there was only one dog in it, it was a shitzu. 26-sep 19:43:05 ^^^ 787 what's the name of the scottish dentist? phil mcavity 24-jan 7:14:15 ^^^ 787 5-jun 9:08:22 ^^^ 786 whats round and violent? a vicious circle 13-jan 21:11:58 ^^^ 776 did you hear about the buddhist who refused a painkilling injection while having root canal surgery??? he wanted to transcend – dental – medication!! 16-may 10:02:05 ^^^ 773 why don't blind people like to skydive? because it scares the dog. 28-jan 21:50:30 ^^^ 773 9-jun 6:47:47 ^^^ 772 there was a man who entered a local paper’s pun contest.. he sent in ten different puns, in the hope that at least one of the puns would win. unfortunately, no pun in ten did 6-jun 5:54:48 ^^^ 771 the graduate with a science degree asks, "why does it work?" the graduate with an engineering degree asks, "how does it work?" the graduate with an accounting degree asks, "how much will it cost?" the graduate with an arts degree asks, "do you want fries with that?" 6-feb 9:50:55 ^^^ 771 what kind of ties do pigs wear? a pig-sty 13-jan 21:09:16 ^^^ 769 i recently met a dutch girl, a dutch girl with inflatable shoes….. so i rang her up to see if she wanted to go out on a date….. unfortunately she’d popped her clogs! 16-may 10:02:22 ^^^ 769 5-jun 9:07:35 ^^^ 763 what does dna stand for? the national association of dyslexics 2-jun 6:08:47 ^^^ 763 a man received a parrot for his birthday. the parrot was fully grown, with a bad attitude and worse vocabulary. every other word was an expletive. those that weren't expletives were, to say the least, rude.the man tried hard to change the bird's attitude and was constantly saying polite words, playing soft music, anything he could think of to try and set a good example. nothing worked. he yelled at the bird and the bird yelled back.he shook the bird and the bird just got more angry and more rude. finally, in a moment of desperation, the man put the parrot in the freezer. for a few moments he heard the bird squawk and kick and scream. then suddenly there was quiet. not a sound for half a minute. the man was frightened that he might have hurt the bird and quickly opened the freezer door. the parrot calmly stepped out onto the man'sextended arm and said, "i believe i may have offended you with my rude language and actions. i will endeavor at once to correct my behavior. i really am truly sorry and beg your forgiveness." the man was astonished at the bird's change in attitude and was about to ask what had made such a dramatic change when the parrot continued,"may i ask what the chicken did?" 16-may 5:57:13 ^^^ 760 q: what do you call a man with a spade in his head? a: dug 9-jan 18:05:47 ^^^ 755 a priest, a doctor, and an engineer were waiting one morning for a particularly slow group of golfers. the engineer fumed, "what's with those guys? we must have been waiting for fifteen minutes!" the doctor chimed in, "i don't know, but i've never seen such inept golf!" the priest said, "here comes the greens-keeper. let's have a word with him." he said, "hello george, what's wrong with that group ahead of us? they're rather slow, aren't they?" the greens-keeper replied, "oh, yes. that's a group of blind firemen. they lost their sight saving our clubhouse from a fire last year, so we always let them play for free anytime!" the group fell silent for a moment. the priest said, "that's so sad. i think i will say a special prayer for them tonight." the doctor said, "good idea. i'm going to contact my ophthalmologist colleague and see if here's anything she can do for them." the engineer said, "why can't they play at night?" 6-feb 9:50:25 ^^^ 753 4-jun 5:52:16 ^^^ 749 what's yellow and very, very dangerous? shark infested custard 19-feb 7:30:10 ^^^ 742 a lady went to the vets with her pet duck, she put it on the table and said to the vet 'help cuddles please he's not well' the vet looked at the duck and said 'i'm sorry but your duck is dead'. the woman was distraught and said 'he can't be get me a second opinion'. 'but cuddles is dead' said the vet, 'i need a second opinion' said the woman. the vet went out and a few minutes later a dog came in, it sniffed the duck and signalled that the duck was dead, even more distressed the woman said to the vet 'i need another opinion'. the vet went out again and returned with a cat. the cat looked over the duck and signalled that it was dead. the vet said to the woman i am sorry but your duck is dead and here is your bill. the woman took the bill and exclaimed '£500 just to tell me my duck was dead that's robbery', the vet replied 'it would have been £25 but you insisted on the lab report and the cat scan 5-jun 9:20:55 ^^^ 742 9-sep 9:17:10 ^^^ 741 why did the painter sell his paintings? because he had no monet (money)! 19-may 5:45:34 ^^^ 734 a man goes to the doctor and says: 'do

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Whois Information

Whois is a protocol that is access to registering information. You can reach when the website was registered, when it will be expire, what is contact details of the site with the following informations. In a nutshell, it includes these informations;

Domain name:
davesjokes.co.uk

Registrant:
David Mateer

Registrant type:
UK Individual

Registrant's address:
The Lea
Wellgreen Lane, Kingston
Lewes
East Sussex
BN7 3NR
United Kingdom

Data validation:
Nominet was able to match the registrant's name and address against a 3rd party data source on 06-Mar-2015

Registrar:
eNom LLC [Tag = ENOM]
URL: http://www.enom.com

Relevant dates:
Registered on: 11-May-2014
Expiry date: 11-May-2018
Last updated: 14-Feb-2018

Registration status:
Registered until expiry date.

Name servers:
ns1.dnsimple.com
ns2.dnsimple.com
ns3.dnsimple.com
ns4.dnsimple.com

WHOIS lookup made at 17:14:10 24-Mar-2018

--
This WHOIS information is provided for free by Nominet UK the central registry
for .uk domain names. This information and the .uk WHOIS are:

Copyright Nominet UK 1996 - 2018.

You may not access the .uk WHOIS or use any data from it except as permitted
by the terms of use available in full at http://www.nominet.uk/whoisterms,
which includes restrictions on: (A) use of the data for advertising, or its
repackaging, recompilation, redistribution or reuse (B) obscuring, removing
or hiding any or all of this notice and (C) exceeding query rate or volume
limits. The data is provided on an 'as-is' basis and may lag behind the
register. Access may be withdrawn or restricted at any time.

  REFERRER http://www.nominet.org.uk

  REGISTRAR Nominet UK

SERVERS

  SERVER co.uk.whois-servers.net

  ARGS davesjokes.co.uk

  PORT 43

  TYPE domain

OWNER

  ORGANIZATION David Mateer

TYPE
UK Individual

ADDRESS
The Lea
Wellgreen Lane, Kingston
Lewes
East Sussex
BN7 3NR
United Kingdom
Data validation:
Nominet was able to match the registrant's name and address against a 3rd party data source on 06-Mar-2015

DOMAIN

  SPONSOR eNom LLC [Tag = ENOM]

  CREATED 2014-05-11

  CHANGED 2018-02-14

STATUS
Registered until expiry date.

NSERVER

  NS1.DNSIMPLE.COM 162.159.24.4

  NS2.DNSIMPLE.COM 162.159.25.4

  NS3.DNSIMPLE.COM 162.159.26.4

  NS4.DNSIMPLE.COM 162.159.27.4

  NAME davesjokes.co.uk

DISCLAIMER
This WHOIS information is provided for free by Nominet UK the central registry
for .uk domain names. This information and the .uk WHOIS are:
Copyright Nominet UK 1996 - 2018.
You may not access the .uk WHOIS or use any data from it except as permitted
by the terms of use available in full at http://www.nominet.uk/whoisterms,
which includes restrictions on: (A) use of the data for advertising, or its
repackaging, recompilation, redistribution or reuse (B) obscuring, removing
or hiding any or all of this notice and (C) exceeding query rate or volume
limits. The data is provided on an 'as-is' basis and may lag behind the
register. Access may be withdrawn or restricted at any time.

  REGISTERED yes

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